But why do we struggle finding love or maintaining loving relationships? Why Highly Intelligent People Struggle to Find Love - I Heart Intelligence 15 Reasons Why Highly Intelligent People Struggle With Love The Forgotten Art of Love. When it comes to love, try not to overthink things. Why intelligent people struggle with love? That being said, their trust is hard to gain. And how can they overcome it? Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. Ending an affair can be harder than starting one. They may have high standards that are difficult to meet or simply be too shy or introverted to put themselves out there. However, when it came to style of conflict resolution, the Mensa group showed a greater tendency to steer clear of disagreements with their partners. Copyright 2022 Bennett, Coleman & Co. Ltd. All rights reserved.For reprint rights: You are now subscribed to the lifestyle Newsletter, 7 reasons why intelligent people have a hard time finding love. They make every decision after logically considering all the options. But why is this the case, and what can you do to increase your chances of finding romance? The greater my need for external affirmation and validation is, the more my mind will be preoccupied with it, and the harder it is for me to dedicate effort and time to love and the harder it is to have deep, meaningful relationships. Love is illogical. Why Highly Intelligent People Struggle With Love | 15 ReasonThere are many reasons why highly intelligent people struggle with love and relationships. It does no good, but it causes a lot of problems. Highly intelligent people often struggle with love because they have a hard time understanding why people do the things they do. 2017. You just met The One or maybe a shady character. 3. However, if youre someone who is able to keep your cool under pressure and think on your feet, then you might find that dating is actually easier for you. They may also be very analytical and overthink everything in a relationship. These people are too authentic for their own good. With the right approach and determination, everyone can find someone who loves them for all that makes them unique and special. 15 Reasons Why Highly Intelligent People Struggle To Find Love And Maintaining Relationship | UGOOD According to studies, many intelligent people struggle to find love. Yes, you may avoid pain, but you'll also avoid joy. We serve, By subscribing to newsletter, you acknowledge our, Find out about the latest Lifestyle, Fashion & Beauty Trends, Relationship tips & the buzz on Health & Food, Exclusive details about SRK's surgery revealed, SSR's connection with Kriti's new venture, Mahesh Bhatt revisits Hum Hain Rahi Pyar Ke. They fear that entering a relationship may infringe upon their autonomy, so they choose to remain single. We've detected your location as Mumbai. Psychology Tips and Tricks That Can Make Your Life Much Easier. You may also worry that people seem to be driven away by your intellect, rather than attracted to it. The key is to focus on your strengths and use them to your advantage. To determine whether someone is trying to control you, sometimes you have to look at the behavior in context. If it doesn't feel right to do so or you become unhappy, then maybe this is a sign that your goal should be something other than manifesting-love right now. They may not relate well to others or feel like they fit in with their peers. These people would not keep things from you and are always completely honest. A healthy relationship embraces freedom, allowing both partners to grow individually and together.Reason number eleven: They are bold. This is a bad thing when it comes to making decisions of the heart. It may seem that being able to remain emotionally neutral would have its advantages for well-being. On the one hand, it could be argued that dating is easier for intelligent people because they can use their intelligence to figure out what the other person is thinking and feeling and use their intelligence to come up with creative ways to impress their date. Why Intelligent People Struggle with Love.? Why intelligent people struggle with love? - Twitter The anguish of being the rejected partner after a breakup can be devastating. In this thought-provoking video, we explore the 6 reasons why highly. These people do not open up often. Driven and ambitious, intelligent individuals often have their entire lives mapped out. Follow me on Twitter @swhitbo for daily updates on psychology, health, and aging, and feel free to join my Facebook group, "Fulfillment at Any Age," to discuss today's blog, or to ask further questions about this posting. In pics: Lakshmi Machu is a diva in sparkling outfits, Ridhi Dogra's fashion taste is pure perfection, Shweta Tiwari's amazing pics from Goa vacay, Shah Rukh Khan can eat these 3 foods for rest of his life, Sonam Bajwas enchanting ethnic looks to get inspired from, International destinations you can fly to directly from Mumbai, Sonakshi Sinha proves that she never had a bad hair day , AI imagined Sushant Singh Rajput in multiverse avatars, Niharika Konidela and Chaitanya JV's love story in pics. They are not going to date just anyone. If you reflect on other aspects of your life, you'll see the roadblocks are often the very thing that ends up directing you to the life you're meant to have. Your email address will not be published. Another side-effect of relying on experience when it comes to love is that intelligent people tend to be way more guarded. A simple example is that we often find ourselves irritated and less amiable to our environment when we are hungry. Although the IQs were not available for the control group, they were not as well-educated as the Mensa participants, and an estimate of what their IQ might be placed them squarely in the range of the average IQ of 108. Smart people know the harsh realities of life and do not like to be in an imaginary too-good-to-be-true world. If falling in love just isn't one of your highest priorities right now, that's fine. Relationships come with a certain amount of reliability. They overanalyze every situation and try to find the hidden meaning in everything, which can lead them to doubt their own feelings and second-guess themselves. Is your impression correct? Highly intelligent people tend to be cautious when selecting partners. In a conversation, the other day, a friend of mine implied that he was single because he was too smart. Lastly, make time for yourself and your partner, even if it means sacrificing some of your work or other commitments. 1. Sometimes being single is the best option for the intelligent person. Looking For Love? They have a harder time opening up because that analytical brain never stops reflecting back on past situations where they opened up to someone, and ultimately got hurt in the process. 6 Reasons Highly Intelligent People Struggle Finding Love For example, you might notice that you're hardly ever attracted to anyone for very long. Intelligent people are dreamers by nature. Foresight, in and of itself, is basically just the ability to analyze a situation, recall relevant past experiences, and make an educated assessment of the future possibilities of the situation. It is not coincidental that those who exemplify love, such as the Buddha or Jesus, were remarkably humble individuals. In . While it's true that we are hardwired to connect with others, many people have a hard time finding. These people are misunderstood and can make wonderful friends and partners. It is intuitive that the more fragile our own perception of self-worth is, the more we crave external validation (and vice versa). We have the ability to direct the focus of our mind. We cannot reach a consensus on if or when a person begins to exist prior to birth. They can think up a lot of bad things, all because they dont want to be deceived into selecting the wrong person. They would rather suffer feeling lonely than be with a person they dont really find attractive. They could settle, but why settle when things are only going to get better. In addition, remember that you can't reason your way in and out of love. Its also possible that, in response to fear of abandonment, you take on a dismissive or detached way of relating to those who would wish to be close to you. Its commonly believed that the more intelligent you are, the easier it will be to find and maintain love. Additionally, when it comes to friendships, those with the highest IQs want to associate with people whom they can learn from, rather than people with whom they are more emotionally allied. Many people are driven by a desire to manifest love; to build a life and a home with someone w. In this article, we will explore some reasons why intelligent people may find it difficult to find love. Why intelligent people struggle with love. Humans are hardwired to connect and form relationships. Dijkstra and her colleagues believe this may reflect the fact that gifted individuals may feel threatened more easily and experience fear in situations that involve emotional intimacy (p. 276). If youre struggling in your relationship because of your intelligence, there are some things you can do to overcome these challenges. They prefer to let their mind call the shots. Love and appreciate yourselfyou're all you have. Using an online calendar, notebook or organizer, make sure that you're budgeting enough time for dating (if you're single), or spending time with a partner (if you're in a relationship). If you want to manifest love, you have to find a way to accept that you can't control every aspect of the experience. The grief process can happen while you're still in the relationship. They do not let their heart speak. Her latest book is The Search for Fulfillment. 6. You might not be very good at compromising, or you might easily feel stifled. @media(min-width:0px){#div-gpt-ad-thelawofattraction_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0-asloaded{max-width:300px!important;max-height:250px!important;}}if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'thelawofattraction_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_11',627,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-thelawofattraction_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0');Of course, you know that you also have weaknesses and soft spots; but at first look, all people may see is your enormous brain! You might be surprised at how well things turn out if you just go with the flow. Intelligent people cherish their freedom to express themselves and pursue their passions. Share. One funny thing about them is that they can play out every possible scenario in their minds analyzing all the possible ways a relationship could go wrong. Intelligent people are easily suspicious especially when trying to choose a partner. If you are also struggling with the same, here are 7 reasons why intelligent people have a hard time finding love. Accept It really depends on the individual and how they use their intelligence regarding dating. The intelligent person obsesses over everything. Obliging (low concern for self and high concern for partner), 4. They have dreams and plans that they set timelines to, and they often drop everything else to focus on them. Presented by Anna. A Novel and Efficient Way to Avoid Academic Burnout, The Nature of Language: Mishearing and Miscommunication, Dance Is a Powerful Tool for Emotional and Physical Health, You Dont Have to Follow the Same Routines Forever, New Studies Prove the Brain Is Still a Mystery, 3 Reasons Why Healthy Relationships Bore Some People, Use a Different Lens to See New Ways to Stop Fighting, 5 Ways to Get Out of an Extramarital Affair, Living With Someone Who Constantly Complains, 5 Things You Need to Find Out About a New Partner, An Unexpected Key to the Most Successful Relationships. Finding love for intelligent people could be very tough, because intelligent people are more likely to analyze and overthink things, more likely to choose their independence, more likely to prioritize career goals, more likely to have higher but unrealistic standards, and the list goes on. They are completely oblivious when it comes to love. Because the intellectually gifted value the life of the mind, theyd be more likely to pair up with partners who see life from the same elevated plane. Do the Relationship Secrets That You Keep Ever Get to You? Why intelligent people struggle with love? If you tend to overthink things or get nervous easily, you might find that dating is indeed harder for you. New research explores how posting about your relationship may protect it. When partners struggle to engage in meaningful conversations or relate to each other's interests, the foundation of the relationship can weaken. This can make people uncomfortable and make them think of you as an arrogant person, even if you are not. What To Know Before Filing For Divorce After One Month Of Marriage? There are 5 reasons why intelligent people struggle with love. They are so focused on achieving their goals, that they have very little time for a relationship. Many people seek relationships because they can't cope with feeling alone, or because they don't feel complete by themselves. What it does mean is that our minds focus and energy are limited and loving relationships require a lot of attention. There are many reasons why highly intelligent people struggle with love and relationships. More posts from r/ArticlesWorthReading. al., Changes in Marital Quality over 6 Years and its Association with Cardiovascular Disease Risk Factors in Men: Findings from the ALSPAC Prospective Cohort Study. Integrating (high concern for self and for partner), 2. Fortunately, this doesnt have to be a death sentence for their romantic prospects. They may feel like they dont fit in or are not really part of the dating scene. Finally, intelligent people may struggle with love because theyre afraid of intimacy. @media(min-width:0px){#div-gpt-ad-thelawofattraction_com-leader-1-0-asloaded{max-width:300px!important;max-height:250px!important;}}if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'thelawofattraction_com-leader-1','ezslot_10',625,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-thelawofattraction_com-leader-1-0'); Meanwhile, when it comes to learning how to compromise, make this explicit. Have you ever wondered why intelligent people often face unique challenges when it comes to matters of the heart? Its typical to assume that its hard to be both brilliant and happy in your relationships. Love is something most people do not understand. Intelligent people don't compromise. However, what if your intelligence comes in the way of finding love? 4 Stages of Adult Development: Where are You? Sometimes, the abundance of negative possibilities overwhelms them, leading to hesitation and even avoidance.Reason number two: They are comfortable being independent. Why intelligent people struggle with love? : r - Reddit But for the highly intelligent, the journey to love can be an intricate maze, filled with unexpected twists and turns.Reason number one: They overthink everything. These people know what they want and what they do not want. There are a few reasons why intelligent people stay single. In fact, when used in the right way, it can deepen your connection with people you love and provide you with a more meaningful relationship over time. Research suggests that people involved in loving relationships generally live longer and are happier than those who are socially isolated. From these two dimensions emerge four conflict styles: 1. If I have very little need to externally affirm my perception of self-worth, my mind is freer to concentrate on love which in turn fuels my own happiness. Love is already hard to find, and it is even more difficult for intelligent people. However, just because they are busy does not mean they cant make time for you. ago. ETimes is an Entertainment, TV & Lifestyle industry's promotional website and carries advertorials and native advertising. There was one potential downside to this otherwise rosy picture: Those in the Mensa sample scored higher on insecure attachment, particularly the variety in which people fear being abandoned by their partners. 3 Months Of Marriage: Can I File For Divorce? They are always on the move. [] Then we'll turn to the five most significant reasons why this link exists. Previous research conducted by Dijkstra showed that gifted single men tend to look for partners who themselves are smart, valuing intellectual attributes more than personality or orientation to having a family. However, establishing and maintaining relationships is not always easy. If you need a little help with this, be sure to get your copy of our Love Tool Kit. Any time you make a decision, you likely do so on the basis of relevant memories, risk assessments, and predictions about the future. They know what they want and they may be comfortable being alone. Bennett-Britton I, Teyhan A, Macleod J, et. Its important to remember that relationships require giving and taking from both sides, and youll need to learn how to be flexible if you want things to work out. Our mind is almost constantly confronted with impulses for thoughts or activities. Read More. 17 Dating Struggles Of Highly Intelligent People - Why Smart People Some believe, getting into a relationship will steal away their independence, so they try to avoid it, or at least stay single for just a while longer. Deliberately pay more attention to your emotions, giving them as much respect as your thoughts. And it's even more difficult for those with a . It can be the most terrifying thing in the world, and some dont believe it exists at all. The Messy Desk Syndrome At RTS, smart people who love to memorize the words while reading have a challenge they have a messy desk. It's a proven fact that the more intellectual a person is, the more they cherish independence. Intelligent people can be much harder to . The smarter you are, the more aware you are of everything that can go wrong, and you may find that you protect yourself to your own detriment. Many people assume that if theyre feeling bored in a relationship, that means the relationship is doomed. But the reality can often be quite different, with smart people struggling to make relationships work just as much as anyone else. There are many reasons why highly intelligent people struggle with love and relationships. So why is this? The Dutch team operated from the framework of attachment theory in their analysis, a view of relationships that regards the way you approach your partner as an extension of the way you related to your parents (or caregivers) as an infant. While . Intelligent people tend to have better foresight. 15 Reasons Why Highly Intelligent People Struggle With Love And its not an easy question to answer. They will choose to be single rather than date a person who makes life hell for them or hurts them in any way. People who complain a lot are struggling with obsessive thoughts that leadthem to ruminate, and will have difficulty giving up the habit. It is the love we experienceindependent of the relationship contextthat fuels our happiness. 07 Feb 2023 10:21:02 Intelligent people are generally very comfortable all by themselves. According to the similarity theory of relationships, being like your partner in personality and intelligence means that youll have more shared emotional experiences accompanied by fewer disagreements (p. 275). Have you ever wondered why some highly intelligent people struggle with love? This can make it difficult to meet new people, especially if youre not the type to go out clubbing or networking. Smart people are the hardest ones to persuade in this world. You may not be able to change your IQ but learning to adapt to your personal strengths and weaknesses is a change from which anyone can benefit. Intellectual compatibility plays a vital role in relationships. However, when it comes to love, they may struggle to find a partner. These latter attributes should auger well for their relationship happiness. Epidemiology and Community Health, 2017; 71: 1094-11.
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